Affairs of the heart is probably the one thing that can either make us feel on top of the world, or it can make us feel as if nothing matters anymore. The most common reason why relationships do go through some difficult times, or bad patches is because we have either stopped paying attention to each other or ourselves. When we first started dating, we were mindful of the other person’s feelings, as they were of ours, or we did little things that we knew would make them happy, but most of all we truly loved them for the person that they are.
Sadly, as time goes on, life overtakes with various things, whether that’s children, or demanding jobs, or caring for loved ones, we start to get cross that our significant other has not done little things. Whether it’s putting the bins out, without us having to ask or something else, you find yourself sometimes feel resentful.
It might be that you feel as if you can’t do right for doing wrong, but whatever the case, we can suddenly stop looking at each other as people with individual wants and needs, and all of a sudden we find ourselves in a situation that we don’t want to be in as we realise the relationship has hit a brick wall. The important thing to understand is that all relationships will go through a bad patch at some time or another; we are after all only human. It is the fact that we have recognised that things aren’t going so well that we start to fight to get back what is lost.
Understanding, Acknowledging and Recognising
If we try to understand why things have gone wrong, and recognise it is not always one party who is the cause, acknowledging the fact that something is amiss, then you are halfway to sorting out the problem. We can then do something about it if we want to save the relationship. Affairs of the heart are something that can make us feel totally elated and on top of the world, but it can also make us feel that our world has fallen apart. The thing is, when we look to fix our relationship, we need to truly want to do so, and the fact that we have realised that things aren’t going so well, would suggest that we truly do want to fix the relationship. Often, it can also be an issue with communication and many couples at some point in their relationship, need to learn to communicate again.
Tips to Improve Your Relationship
What can we do to try to improve and fix the relationship? It is always the small things within any relationship that are the most important. Sometimes it is just a smile and a hello, a simple kindness, an acknowledgement to the other person, and yes sometimes it needs to be big, in the respect of, sincerely forgiving the other person. If one of you needs forgiveness, then it must be given, so that you can work together to move on.
Reminding ourselves why we fell in love with the person in the first instance is usually one of the best things that we can do. This makes us look back and remember how it was. Of course, life changes for all sorts of reasons, but a love for another person doesn’t really change, it usually grows into something bigger, or if we have lost our way, and we feel that we no longer love that person, invariably we can get it back, solely by remembering the little things that we loved about each other.
Another important thing we can do to bring things back, is to remember to meet each other half way. We cannot expect the other person to do all the work, any more than they can expect the same from you, meeting halfway with anything is always a good compromise.